Release Your BUT

Today, I want to Spark Your Happy by encouraging you to let go of your BUT.

Do you ever think you could be happier if your circumstances were different? You’d like to be happier, except that you tense up at the thought of just letting yourself be happy. You blame your unhappiness on a crappy childhood, a horrible break up, or the people who have convinced you that you have a lousy disposition. You accept the idea that you’ll never be as happy as you think you should be. You wish your life was better in some way then you could feel happier. You tend to set your happiness based on something in the future.

• I will be happy BUT I have a boss, spouse, or partner who makes my life miserable.
• I will be happy BUT first, I have to land my dream job or take my dream vacation.
• I would like to be happy BUT people have told me I was born this way and take after my SOB of a great grandfather.
• I will be happy BUT first, I have to lose weight, get fit, conquer this disease.
• I will be happy BUT I’ve got to keep working this job I hate in order to get my kids through college.
• I will be happy BUT first, I have to make more money, be more successful, make a will. Retire. Die.

Stop a sec. Think of your own or someone else’s newborn baby. Think about how you feel toward that infant. People are naturally drawn to babies. They begin to talk baby talk and make exaggerated facial expressions. Doesn’t that memory make you smile? When the baby wiggles, smiles, blows bubbles, or coos, we all go gaga. Right? Even watching a baby sleep makes us feel happy.

           

I believe we are born happy. Happiness draws people to one another. When we keep ruminating on some unfortunate event or get caught up in the busyness of our lives, we tend to lose touch with our natural state of happiness. Once that occurs, we simply need to rediscover and reconnect with that natural state.

           

How do I do that you might ask?

           

Well, what would happen if you let go of reaching for happiness at some unknown time in the future and just allowed yourself to be happy now? Right this minute. What if you stopped for a moment, released your big BUT, and let yourself feel that happiness which is your natural state?

           

Stop again for another second. Think about a time when you felt genuinely happy. It may have been a special birthday or holiday celebration. Perhaps it was the birth of your own child. Your happiest moment might have occurred when you conquered a fear, reached a goal, performed a loving gesture, or caught the sunlight creating a rainbow in a dewdrop.

           

However you arrive at that moment in time when you felt deeply happy, feel it again. Hold onto it. See how easy it is? Every time you feel down, stressed out, or miserable, pull up that memory and practice feeling your natural state of happiness.

           

Release the hold on your BUT and be happy now.

           

Happy Now Here

This is a reprint of a blog I wrote for 2015--with a little addition at the end.

I don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions unless, of course, you want to feed your inadequacies and your belief that you never complete anything you start. Some people thrive on drama in their lives.

The resolutions below aren’t really resolutions at all; they are “unresolutions”. They are ways to live your life to the fullest, of spreading love and joy; thereby improving the world we live in. I believe we attract to ourselves the same energy and light we emit. If you want more love, be more loving. If you want to be happier, be grateful for all you have in your life right now.

As we enjoy a new beginning in 2015 [2016], I invite you to consider these New Year’s “unresolutions”:

1. I live more fully today—and every day this year.
2. I am a more loving person. By doing so, I will also receive the benefits of feeling loved.
3. I treat everyone I meet with kindness. By so doing, I may influence others to spread more kindness in the world.
4. I slow down, power down (put my electronics away), and enjoy the beauty all around me. Look deeply into my loved ones’ eyes. Plant a garden. Enjoy the sunrise, the sunset, and the passing clouds. Watch a snail leave its mark on the world. Soar amongst the eagles (and the turkey vultures).
5. I am grateful for all my blessings but keep a gratitude journal every day. That way, when life gets bumpy, I have my journal to turn to for inspiration and hope.
6. I acknowledge my own inner wisdom, the voice of my soul, my angels, God, and I pay attention.
7. I act on what I am hearing from inside myself knowing that as I do, I am strengthening my intuitive muscle. Even when something doesn’t make sense to my rational mind, my soul knows.
8. I appreciate my own life’s journey. No matter what is put in my path, I recognize that it is put there as a lesson and an opportunity to grow. I am grateful for each lesson and opportunity I am given and will dutifully record these lessons in my gratitude journal.
9. I appreciate the sacred journey of my significant other. We each have our own lessons to learn; we each have our own paths to follow. Mine is no better and no worse than another’s. I choose to honor where they are in their journey.
10. Love. Laugh. Life is full of wonder and joy.

Here is the place; now is the time. Resolve to live your best life in 2015 [2016].

Wishing you radiant health, a peaceful heart, and abundant love.

Happy Now Here!

Namaste.

Since 2016 is upon us, I want to amend the above just a tad. First, now that I've reread it, I really like what I had to say. Did I keep my "unresolutions"? I'm happy to say, yes, at least some of the time. No one is that perfect. Has it made a difference in my life? Absolutely, and for the better I might add.

It's interesting to note that I am facilitating a workshop starting in January, "Spark Your Happy". Our primary purpose is to create some New Year's resolutions. Ahem. Even though I wrote how I don't believe in them. However, the resolutions my workshop participants (and me) will be writing will be specific and measurable. And we will be holding each other accountable for each one. 

Accountability. That's the key. Make it. Share it. And tattle on your friend if s/he doesn't keep it. Well, not exactly. But there is power in groups. And our resolutions are designed to make us feel happier. 

So, I wish you and yours a happier New Year in 2016. Be present. Choose kindness and love above all else. Share your gift of happiness with everyone you meet.